The Bare Minimum in a Relationship

Hi my people,
You’ve probably come across that viral reel where couples ask each other, “Is this bare minimum or extra?” , some of the answers had me blinking in disbelief. Things I always thought were the basics of a relationship were being celebrated like grand gestures. I couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for the partners on the other side of that equation.

It’s funny how one trend can expose such a huge cultural gap in what we expect from love. So here I am, not trying to be extra, but simply doing what I think is the real bare minimum 😉 , encouraging healthier, happier relationships.

What “bare minimum” means

Tum saath ho..ya na ho..kya fark hai.. 😉 never have any lyrics scared me so much.

At its simplest, the “bare minimum” is the least acceptable level of effort or behavior that still keeps a relationship technically intact. The “bare minimum” in a relationship is not rocket science. It is not about planning grand gestures every week or going broke to prove your love. Its about simple everyday things, that keeps the bond alive.

So, what really counts as bare minimum?

👉 Spending quality time
No, you don’t have to plan fancy dates every Saturday. A simple walk after dinner, cooking together, or even sitting and laughing at memes, that’s quality time. The point is to be present, not just physically but emotionally too.

👉 Doing something nice once in a while
Get them their favorite snack, send a random “thinking of you” text, or put the blanket over them when they fall asleep on the couch.(movie inspired :p )  These small gestures? They’re not “extra.” They’re the least you can do.

👉 Standing up for your partner
Bare minimum is standing by your partner, no matter what. If someone crosses them, they should know you’ll turn into their personal bodyguard. (Warning: Dont mess with me, my husband will eat you up 😜). That security? Pure gold.

 👉 Affection both emotional and physical
Hugs, kisses, hand-holding, cuddles, forehead taps ,these are not optional. Neither is emotional affection: checking in, reassuring them of your love, and actually saying how you feel.

👉 Compliments (the most underrated bare minimum!)
Listen, compliments are not just for the first three months of dating. A “you look great today” or “I’m so proud of you” is basic. If I were in charge, I’d make complimenting your partner a monthly filing requirement, just like income tax. And the returns? Confidence, happiness, and a relationship that doesn’t turn boring.

Why this matters

The bare minimum doesn’t mean you’re being dramatic or needy it’s literally the foundation. When these basics are missing, you feel unseen, unloved, and like you’re begging for scraps. But when they’re there? Everything else (the dates, surprises, gifts) feels like a sweet bonus instead of the only proof of love.

Bare minimum is not about “doing just enough to survive.” It’s about the everyday care that keeps love breathing. Think of it like water for a plant, you don’t put fertilizer on it every day, but you do water it regularly. Without that, no amount of roses on Valentine’s Day can save it.

So, tell me honestly: are you giving your partner the bare minimum… or just the bare excuse? 😉

Bare Minimum Checklist

• Spend quality time (walks, late-night chai, doing stuff just the two of you, just be present).
• Give compliments often (“you smell nice,” “you handled that so well,” “damn you look good today”).
• Show affection, hugs, kisses, cuddles, or even holding hands in public.
• Stand up for your partner (be their shield, not a silent bystander).
• Offer emotional assurance (“I love you,” “I’m proud of you,” “I’m here”).
• Do small, thoughtful things without being asked (make coffee, send a good morning text, fix something broken).
• Listen when they talk, really listen, not the “half scrolling Instagram” kind.
• Celebrate their small wins (a good workout, finishing a tough project, even parallel parking in one go 😅).
• Share responsibilities (be it chores, kids stuff, or showing up at family functions).
• Check in during the day, a simple “how’s your day going?” is powerful.
• Apologize when you’re wrong, not with excuses, just a genuine “sorry.”
• Be consistent , love isn’t about showing up once in a blue moon, it’s about being steady.

If you tick most of these, you’re giving your relationship the water and sunlight it needs. 🌱

Love & Ice creams
Sneha Singhvi